


The ones who left us

by Ancalima



Series: Safe here [27]
Category: Star Wars: Rebels
Genre: Family, Fluff, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-08-10 23:55:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,848
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7866685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ancalima/pseuds/Ancalima
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grief takes time. Finding you can breath and live with the unimaginable takes time. Ezra finds slowly that he can. Or alternativly, five times Ezra talks about his parents and finds it doesn't hurt as much as he thought it would.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The ones who left us

**Author's Note:**

> So...I have quite a few chapters written down. But I have to confess, I'm...pretty high on painkillers and I have trouble focusing and I need to find somewhere to catch the SWR episodes I'm missing. But enjoy what I have!

“You know, until I was about...oh six, I was firmly convinced babies came from the butt.” Ezra said, his voice cutting through the command room and effectively silencing all the planning.

They had been at this for hours with Commander Sato and the rest. Discussing, arguing, setting up new plans, handing out missions. Ezra was fifteen, he was bored and he had eventually laid down on top of one of the console coverings, staring at the ceiling with his hands resting on his stomach, especially his still sore and tender one that he was still on painkillers for which was why he was bored as he was not allowed to train on his own.

His comment had come out of no where too.

And Kanan had been about to scold his padawan when the reality of what the other had said hit him. “What?” He got out, a slight choked sound to his voice as he heard others snigger quietly around him, staring at the blue eyed boy who was resting against the metal on his back.

“Babies from the butt. I was pretty aware it was something like that but I didn't have the parts to figure out it exactly.” Ezra waved a hand, still looking at the ceiling. “Stomach grows, period of that and this time in different species until its big enough and out it comes. I just had the wrong hole pegged.” There were more sniggers and even a cough to cover a outright laugh.

“My dad laughed for a hour when I told him my theory. And I think my mother broke her favorite vase by dropping it.” He was grinning a bit at the memories. “They explained it of course, after mom stopped hitting him with a book. I don't think I ever seen him blush as much as he did then.” 

“They explained it?”

“Well kind of. Not in full graphic details.” Ezra sat up and stretched. “Anyhow, I'm starving and you're doing detail work, gonna go find a nutribar or something.” He wandered away.

There was more laughing as everyone forced themselves back to work.

Kanan slowly shook his head. Babies from the butt indeed.

()()()()()

Hera smiled a bit as Ezra put his head on her shoulder, feeling the overheated skin of the human teen. “You know I need to work.” She murmured quietly, waving her datapad a bit.

“Not trying to read it. Just wanna...stay here.” The other murmured back as quietly, a slight hoarseness to his voice while nuzzling her arm. He'd deny it if called on it so Hera let it be. “Alright, as long as you don't try to read these, you can stay.” She resisted the urge to pet his hair, smiling ever so slightly while checking that the blanket was still around his shoulders.

Ezra just gave a low hum and stayed against her side, his breathing a bit thickly from illness. His gaze was focused on a spot on the wall, not really seeing it as he drowsed a bit.

“...When I was sick when I was little...” He absently noted Hera's fingers had stopped on the datapad. “My mother would bundle me up and put me on the couch in the living room, to keep a eye on me.” Ezra smiled a tiny bit against Hera's shoulder. “Dad would make this...creamy soup and they'd work around me, quietly while I napped or just watched the holonet.” 

Hera looked at the young teen against her shoulder. “Yeah?”

“Yeah...they'd come sit with me as long as they weren't working...it was...nice.” He smiled ever so slightly and closed his eyes. “Like this...”

Hera smiled softly at that. “...You can stay here as long as you like Ezra love.”

()()()()()

“You know, I'm curious about one thing.” Sabine said while tinkering on her bombs in the quiet of their common room, the others of Force knew where. Ezra looked up from where he was getting more soup, his face still a bit flushed from the lingering cold in his system. 

“Yeah?” He asked curiously.

“You could read. A tiny bit. But its clear you didn't go to school. Yet again its clear you had some schooling. So...where did you learn?” Sabine looked up curiously, knowing that the bomb in her hand was not armed and wouldn't go of anytime soon as she watched the dark haired teen in the kitchen.

Now, Ezra had a choice. He could spin her a lie, he could refuse to answer...or he could do what family did and talk to her and tell her the truth.

Had this been a year ago, he wouldn't even have thought to tell her the truth, the lie would have been on the tip of his tongue before he could even think it out fully. 

But this wasn't a year ago. And this was Sabine. So he answered honestly. “My parents started homeschooling me. When I turned six I mean. By the time they were...they were taken, I already knew my letters.” He tried to shrug it of and focus on his soup.

It was a slow burn in his chest, the memory of his parents sitting with him, patiently teaching him his letters and numbers. Numbers had been easy to pick up on the street, you knew to count if you wanted to survive. Letters were basic, as long as you knew the signs and knew the names, you could find your way and reading wasn't as important.

Ezra almost dropped his mug when she suddenly hugged him, having moved from the table while Ezra was contemplating. “Thank you...for telling me.” She said quietly against his hair.

“...Hey, you did teach me the difficult stuff. So guess I owed you.” He returned the smile hesitantly.

()()()()()()

“...What?”

“I said...I said I can't swim alright.” Ezra glared up at Zeb, soaking wet from being thrown to the shallow of the water when they dropped out of the TIE so it could crash further away. He was sure if it wasn't for the Force, he would have broken his damn legs.

That didn't make it any better that they were on a island in the middle of what appeared to be the ocean of this planet. 

“So you're telling me, that you can't leave this island or you drown?” Zeb's eyes was practically bugging out of his head before he cursed and covered his face. “You didn't think this was something you should have mentioned, oh I don't know, BEFORE the mission?”

“Hey! I asked if we were going to land. No, we weren't, we were suppose to stay on the Ghost or the Phantom. Or at worst we were going to be on base, doing work, distracting and bashing in some stormtrooper haeds. Not...here!” Ezra wrapped his arms around himself, shivering a bit from the wind and the water logged clothes he was wearing.

“I'm from Lothal Zeb, I grew up on the grassy plains AND I was alone since I was seven, I lived in a communication hub far from the ocean and my parents didn't have time to teach me before they were gone. When do you think had I had the time or place to learn to swim!” He was shivering harder now.

Zeb slowly dropped his hands at that, staring at Ezra. “...Alright, I can swim but I'm not confidant I can swim and help you at the same time, its a far distance. Our best bet is for Kanan to guide Hera to us. After all you two can find each other through that bond you two have. Or for Hera or Chopper to trace our coms” He breathed out then moved to Ezra, tugging him further onto the island and wrapping his arms around him. “And you're growing cold, so whatever complains you have about my smell, stuff them.” He grumbled.

Ezra gave a slight grunt then pushed himself more against the older males side, shaking a bit harder at a gust of wind. “...My dad was going to teach me to swim before they took him away.” He offered softly to Zeb and the Lasat hummed at that, squeezing Ezra slowly. “Well... we'll see about teaching you soon.”

“...Thanks Zeb.”

()()()()()

“Huh? Chopper?” Ezra looked up at the droid, blinking at him from where he was doing diagnostic on the Phantom. The droid was just quietly watching him and Ezra frowned. “Okay rustbucket, I don't know what you're thinking but please let me work on this, Hera's gonna kill me or worse, force me to take care of the ion scorching again if I don't.” He focused back down.

And then back up when Chopper whooped something at him. “I...what?”

Chopper waved his arms a bit. “No, that disc is here, with me. Why were you looking for the disc Sabine gave me?” Ezra asked suspiciously, his defenses rising sharply.

The astromech rolled a bit closer, twirling his dome to check if anyone was close before beeping at Ezra again. 

“What's on it? I...my parents of course. Sabine managed to clean up the disc and...she found a picture of them.” He focused back down on the diagnostic. And then a thin mechanical hand held out a second disk to him. Ezra blinked then looked up at Chopper, the mech watching in in turn.

“Chopper?” He frowned, taking the disk and peering at it. “What's this?”

The mech was silent and waited for Ezra to play it on the Phantom. And then Ezra stared. It was him, it was his parents. They were laughing though the recording had no sound and Ezra was on his father's back. It was a security video that much was clear but...it was them.

He continued staring, eyes half wide. “Where did...”

Chopper whooped and beeped quickly in binary.

“On the old Lothal security base? You were...did you go LOOKING for this?” Ezra asked quietly, letting the recording loop, eyes greedily taking in his mother and fathers smile and laugh. He could almost hear the laugh in his ears.

A quieter confirmation and then a even smaller question.

“...Yeah Chopper, you did good. You did GOOD.” Ezra whispered as moisture dropped of his face and onto the back of his hands.

“You did SO good.”

()()()()()()

Letting go of grief was not easy. 

Coming to terms with what was almost unimaginable. But with the steady trickle of time, Ezra was coming to it. With the help of those who loved him now, he could live with what was once unimaginable, he could talk about his parents to them.

Long conversations or short. Little mentions and memories.

So when he stepped into the main room of the Ghost, staring at those who had become his family, he felt the Force gently push at him.

“...Did I ever tell you all about what my parents used to do before the Empire?” He offered while stepping in, a smile on his face.

His smile was answered by the smile of his crew. His family.


End file.
